OCEAN'S ELEVEN (Steven Soderbergh, 2001) R

Reviewed: May 11, 2002

When I left the theater after seeing Ocean's Eleven opening night, I was extremely disappointed. I felt like Soderbergh and Clooney and Pitt and Roberts and Damon and everyone else had fucked me over, had majorly let me down. It's not that I went into Ocean's Eleven expecting a Traffic-- I went in expecting the highest caliber popcorn film... in the form of a heist flick. I knew Ocean's Eleven wouldn't be nominated for any awards. I knew it didn't have any polemic aspirations. I just wanted to be entertained in the most innocent and euphoric way possible. As only a talent like Soderbergh can. I wanted a big fat fucking glossy high-budget studio star pic mounted to utter perfection.

But leaving the theater I was so damn upset not because I wasn't entertained but because I felt like Soderbergh and everyone else involved made 1/50 the film they were capable of. Yes, I was always entertained, but not in an even close to euphoric way. Just marginally, only because there was no reason not to be entertained, nothing to object to. I felt like everyone sleepwalked through the thing... effortlessly turning in the kind of performances they are capable of without breaking a sweat or batting an eyelash... performances they've turned in many times previous... content, never really swinging for the fence, or even the outfield. But most importantly I felt the source of all the problems was Ted Griffin's script. I thought it was a mediocre genre exercise, lacking in any kind of originality or inspiration or real excitement. But what really killed the script and thus the movie was the complete and total lack of conflict. I felt I'd just seen a movie with invincible characters. They need someone? Bang, they get 'em. They need a device? Bang, they have it. They need something to happen? Bang, it does. It's like they all have their own magic genie and what fun is that? No problem lasts for more than a few seconds. There's no tension. I kept waiting for some big moment of drama, and I don't mean drama like Shakespearean drama, I just mean drama like uh-oh what's gonna happen next, how are they gonna get out of this. Some payoff. Some reason to keep caring. But nope. Nothing. Piece of cake.

I wanted to see Clooney get his legs broken, I wanted to see him struggle. I love Clooney but he basically gave this same performance in the perfect Out of Sight, only there he had the material to go a lot deeper with the role. I wanted to see Clooney and Pitt and everyone else for that matter, squirm around. I wanted there to be something at stake besides some money and a girl I didn't care about cause she's never anything but "the girl."

So now it is with a combination of embarrassment and glee that I report that upon second viewing, I both enjoyed and appreciated Ocean's Eleven a lot more. I let go of a lot of my anger. Having my expectations reality-checked freed me up to experience the film this second time for what it is, not what it isn't. The strongest elements amplified and snapped into focus (although every time this snapping happened it also momentarily, simultaneously reawakened my disappointment that Ocean's is not something more-- precisely because it so easily could have been).

Now none of this is to say I didn't at least notice the same problems I did the first time.

I still despise how there's no sustained conflict in this film. Absolutely none. I still despise how they build Andy Garcia's villain up and up and it turns out he's nothing but a weak fool. It's especially frustrating because Garcia turns in a terrific performance -- and that says a lot coming from me, a notorious Garcia hater. The way he subtly plays around with his constant suspicion, the calm that seems to hide ferocity... the off-putting way he always seems about to explode (but only gets to once and it's only for a brief moment, a line or two -- so another big missed opportunity)... all great work.

I still detest Don Cheadle's stupid fucking accent. It's awful because not only does it never seem real for a second, but it feels like the worst kind of movie joke, the kind that is so self-aware and pointless that it proves not only did Cheadle never take his character seriously, but no one else did either, especially Soderbergh. It seems like the kind of thing you see in one take on a gag reel... a small 'haha there's Cheadle doing a bizarre, faux British accent.' Too bad Soderbergh apparently saw that take and decided... genius! Let's have him talk with that accent for the entire fucking film!!! But if Cheadle's not taking his character seriously why the fuck should the audience? Soderbergh commented in an interview while in production on Ocean's Eleven that if they have any of the smugness of the original, they're dead. Well I haven't seen the original but I think it's about time Stevie looked up the definition of smug in the dictionary. Cause not only do I think there's tons of it in Ocean's Eleven in uh...well...in every single cast member and every single moment...but the very fact that Cheadle speaks in that God damn accent for the whole film is the smuggest thing imaginable! I know, I know, lighten up, it's funny, who cares, right? Well that doesn't cut it. And more importantly, in general Cheadle's completely wasted in this movie.

I also still think the last fifteen or twenty minutes crumble to shit.

***ENDING SPOILERS TO FOLLOW***

Hey they've finally broken into the vault! Uh-oh what's gonna happen next! Garcia's gonna catch them right... all hell is gonna break lose... the cops are gonna come... Garcia's gonna torture them, Garcia's gonna destroy them... ahhhhhhh! Trouble will finally ensue! Something will finally go wrong! Yeah!

Wrong. Nope. When push comes to shove and all else fails and conflict almost sneaks its way in it's time to break out the old remote controlled vans and tapping into 911's telephone mainframe to MAKE ABSOLUTE CERTAIN NOTHING EVER GOES EVEN SLIGHTLY WRONG FOR THE OCEAN'S 11 GANG! Conflict?! What the fuck is that?! Never heard the word before.

Speaking of which I especially still hate when Cheadle's character tells the Ocean gang that they're in trouble because the city is fixing some problem that was going to enable them to cut the power during the heist. Uh-oh... do I sense a problem? Do I sense a...what will they-- NOPE! Nope. Whew. That was a close call. For a second I thought there would be some conflict. But here's what happens instead:

Cheadle... we have a problem, what are we gonna do about this... Pitt... can we pull the heist tomorrow? Clooney... no way, too soon. Cheadle... okay then the solution is to steal a Pinch, which is an engine-sized device powerful enough to knock out all the power in Las Vegas but there's only one and it's at some research lab CUT TO: The gang stealing it!

Well whoop de do dah. Call in the conflict police. Ignore the fact that a pinch, aka an electromagnetic pulse, is one of the most interesting devices I could ever imagine bringing into a movie and exploring the implications of. But hey man, why would we wanna do that? We're too busy just looking cool.

UPDATED: A knowledgeable friend had some great comments to prove that indeed, an electromagnetic pulse is endlessly fascinating and criminally underused as a plot device in Ocean's Eleven. Here they are:

"An electromagnetic pulse is more valuable than the money they steal in terms of how much they could hold a city for ransom with it or sell it to other terrorists.
It would, due to how dangerous it is, be kept in a compound much more difficult to break into than the Bellagio's vault.
It's so dangerous that the instant they stole it the FBI, CIA, NSA, and all of those other acronyms that may exist or may just be paranoid fantasies would be scouring the country for them in the biggest manhunt in history.
When they use it every computer in Las Vegas without amazing magnetic shielding would have been erased."

Click Here To Read A House of Representatives and Committee on National Security Transcript On "THREAT POSED BY ELECTROMAGNETIC PULSE (EMP) TO U.S. MILITARY SYSTEMS AND CIVIL INFRASTRUCTURE"

I still hate Julia Robert's final line to Garcia which commits the most unforgivable of screenwriting sins: it smugly and drowning in self-awareness echoes a line another character says previous. Does anyone like this device, ever? No! Let's save it for lame action films, shall we? A villain says a line to the hero at the beginning, the hero says it back to the villain at the end right before he kills him.

I still hate that what could have been a great final scene is ruined because Soderbergh felt for some inexplicable reason that Clooney and Pitt should be aware Garcia's goons are tailing them. Once again...

***END SPOILERS***

Oh fuck it, I'll stop complaining. This review was originally gonna be written from the angle of a newfound joy I beheld in Ocean's Eleven. Those strong elements amplified. And they are:

1) Brad Pitt's character. A few offhand lines suggest the brilliance that could have been: Him talking about how bored he is and how he's only suicidal in the morning. Plus while pointless, you just can't help but the love the touch of him always eating. 2) The first (and practically only) scene between Roberts and Clooney hit me where it should this time. I actually felt these two had a history, I felt Clooney's longing to pick the relationship back up. And I really appreciated the wit and the strength of the dialogue. Great scene. Again, hints of what could have been. 3) I appreciated Soderbergh's fantastic, flawless directing (well flawless in a lose sense; from a compositional and choreographic standpoint, flawless) and editing and half-impressionist, half-naturalist, always interesting cinematography more than last time (but again this unfortunately comes back to the fact that his level of talent simply demands better source material). 4) I dug the humor more.

And I figured out a key fact. This is a two hour film with thirteen important characters. It never seems to waste any time... so without completely overhauling and restructuring the entire film... it can't really do more than it does. It can't insert any conflict. It can't make anyone squirm. It can't develop the love triangle. It can't give us an actual reason to fear Garcia. It would need two and a half hours. I'm not letting it off the hook... I'm just struggling to understand a little better where Soderbergh and company were coming from. I didn't want the movie to end so fast and I don't think it should have, but Soderbergh disagrees. Or at least Warner Bros or Ted Griffin do. And so be it.

Point being, second time out I enjoyed Ocean's Eleven a lot more. I guess I didn't want to be as much of an ingrate. As Wells' says, even only good movies are rare. I guess I realized I shouldn't look a gifthorse in the mouth. This is the movie Soderbergh made and that's that. It gives pleasure from beginning to end as he's said was his only goal. Yeah, I still think he could have done a lot more than that. Yeah, I still think the pleasure quotient can and should have been amped up big time. Yeah, I still feel the sting of disappointment. But it's buried deeper now.

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